


Getting Back to Somewhere

by Shadadukal



Category: Sanctuary (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-10-02
Updated: 2011-10-02
Packaged: 2017-10-24 06:17:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 21,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/260041
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shadadukal/pseuds/Shadadukal
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>While Nikola hunts Nazis with John, Nigel meets Susan Reed and marries. Years after, Nikola turns up on his doorstep, starving and a changed man. In the following years, Nigel does his utmost to turn his friend back to his former self out of friendship and love.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Getting Back to Somewhere

**Author's Note:**

> First, I must point you in the direction of the two beautiful art pieces clwilson2006 made for this story: [poster](http://pics.livejournal.com/shadadukal/pic/006bwde4) and [banner](http://pics.livejournal.com/shadadukal/pic/006bt6qa). Thank you!
> 
> Second, acknowledgements. First to my beta grav_ity and to all those who cheered me on, especially vickysg1. Second, this story references stories by other authors: [One Man War](http://artaxastra.livejournal.com/391638.html) by Artaxastra, and many of icarus_chained's Nigel/Nikola fics, especially [Worth the Risk](http://icarus-chained.livejournal.com/235936.html).
> 
> Finally, this is a prequel to my own fic [Guardian](http://the-wild-karrde.livejournal.com/37618.html). They can be read in either order.

Thunder cracks loudly in the sky, accompanying the heavy downpour, flashing in the dark clouds. Nature playing with electricity. The sight brings Nikola to mind, Nikola who hasn't been seen or heard from since June 1944. Helen directed a wounded Druitt to his flat, and is now extremely annoyed at herself for failing to consider that Nikola could have seized this as an opportunity to leave. Nigel can't blame him for wanting out of his gilded cage. In fact, he understands perfectly. He sought to escape scrutiny after the Great War, and did it again almost as soon as this most recent one ended. No, he can't blame Nikola. What annoys him is that in the year and a half since, Nikola has failed to reappear or to at least send a sign that he is alive, if perhaps not all right. Nigel is quite sure where the dumb bastard would have asked Druitt to take him and nothing good could possibly have come of it.

Helen has promised to send word if they hear anything. James is angry at Nigel for leaving, just as he is angry at Nikola. Nigel can tell that Helen is thinking of leaving as well. He doesn't intend to come back. Not that he intends to stay in New York either. It is a convenient starting point to settle in the United States. But there are too many memories here and those make him miss Nikola even more. The other man would never show up here, where he might be recognized.

For now, Nigel is helping out with the Sanctuary in New York City. That keeps him busy and gives him a place to stay while he figures out what he wants. Other than a part-vampire genius. Well, actually, there is another thing, but one can't just walk into a shop and buy it. He wants what he planned to have with Jeanette Anaise until their relationship fell apart. The war brought them together, and she didn't mind his abnormality, their age difference or even the fact he has no idea how long he will actually live. Unlike Helen, who hasn't aged at all since the Experiment, he has showed minimal signs of ageing, the hair at his temples having turned grey. With Jeanette, they talked about having a family. It is a good thing that he didn't accidentally get Jeanette pregnant before they came to the realization that each expected the other to settle in their respective country. He can't blame Jeanette for wanting to stay in France and help rebuild. Normandy has been devastated; there is a lot of work to be done. Nigel gave some thought to staying in France but he felt out of place there, for all that the country is beautiful – war destruction notwithstanding – and Jeanette's family very welcoming. Sometimes, love just isn't enough. He is grateful that the time they spent together has made him realize how much he wants a family. Collecting monsters is all fine and dandy but unlike Helen, Nikola and James, he has never lived solely for science. He suspects that was also the case for John, but John would never have a family now. Nigel can still have one, if he meets the right woman.

+++

Nigel is in New York, Nikola somewhere on the planet, John lost, and her house is increasingly smaller for both James and herself. In addition to that, after almost one century of calling the same house home, she wants to move. And far away. Any place in Europe won't do. She also doesn't want to settle into any of the already established Sanctuary Houses, such as New York. No, she wants a place that is just _hers_. A Sanctuary she can arrange as she wants without consulting anyone or dealing with a system put in place by a previous Head of House.

Nigel apparently plans to keep to North America. It is tempting to join him there, the knowledge that another of the Five is at least on the same continent a comfort.

+++

Nigel has been in New York for about six months. He hasn't made definite plans yet, but he has decided to move to Louisiana. The abnormal community there is thriving, strongly relying on one another. They can probably use a chemist. He wants to be around other abnormals, not abnormals kept in cells, but rather abnormals who go about their daily lives just like any other person. He has recently received a letter from Helen, who plans to settle on the west coast of North America, but she hasn't decided exactly where yet. He puts aside the answer he is writing her when the waiter brings his lunch.

Neither of them has heard anything from Nikola. Even if there have been times when he was out of contact with Nikola for longer, he at least knew where Nikola was and had a general idea of what he was up to. Now Nigel is getting worried. It doesn't help that Nikola disappeared while Nigel was in France. He can't help but think that if he had come back to England, Nikola wouldn't have left. He doesn't regret staying in France per se, and perhaps Nikola would have left regardless, but Nigel still somehow feels guilty. They said goodbye as best they could before he left for Normandy with Helen and James, but it had been a goodbye for a mission, albeit an extremely dangerous mission behind enemy lines, and not an I-won't-see-you-again-for-years goodbye.

"Pardon, Sir, may I sit here? All the other tables are full."

Nigel looks up at the woman who has spoken. She is of average height, her light brown hair frizzing a little because of the humidity.

"Of course," he replies.

She takes off her coat. Once, it must have been a refined coat, likely a mix of cashmere and wool, but it is now getting frayed at the hems of the sleeves.

"Nigel Griffin," he introduces himself, rising and extending his hand to her. She shakes it with a smile.

"Susan Reed."

Moments after she has sat down, a waiter appears besides their table.

"The usual?" he asks her.

"Yes, please." The waiter leaves. "I hope I'm not disturbing you," she says, turning toward him again.

"No, you're not." Her blue eyes remind him of Nikola's. He mentally shakes himself. He has to live in the here and now; he can't spend his time wondering what has become of his friend.

"Are you all right?" she asks, her eyes compassionate.

"I was..." He shakes his head; there are ways to say this, other than _'I'm worried sick about my vampire lover'_. "My best friend has been missing since the war. He could be..." He doesn't finish. It is unlikely that Nikola is actually dead, but it remains possible. After all, vampires were exterminated in the past. It probably takes some doing to kill one, but it clearly is possible.

"I understand. My husband died in the war," she says, sadness filling her eyes.

He briefly glances at her left hand, a motion she still notices.

"One has to let go... and live on," she says, with sadness in her eyes, but a small, determined smile.

She has a point.

"Please, don't let me keep you from eating your meal while it's still hot."

"You'll have to talk for us both then."

"And what shall we talk about?"

She has a warm smile.

"What do you do for a living?"

"I'm a nurse."

He nods. That is a good, useful job.

"You're not from the city."

"You're not either," she says, amused.

"I was getting tired of England."

The waiter brings her food then.

"There you go, Mrs. Reed."

"Thank you," she says, smiling at the waiter politely. "I've never seen you here before, not on Fridays anyway."

"You come here every Friday then?"

"The service is prompt, which is good. I like not having to prepare my own lunch once in the week."

"It's my first time eating here."

Usually, he takes his meals at the Sanctuary and, when he does go out, he never goes to the same place twice.

"Have you lived in New York long?" he asks.

"A few years. Where did you live in England?"

"In London."

"I've always wanted to go there," she says wistfully.

"Maybe someday," he replies, smiling at her.

"Who knows?" she allows.

"Do you have any plans for tomorrow night?"

She freezes, her fork half-way to her mouth, and then sets it back down.

"Pardon?"

"I know I'm being forward."

"You barely know me."

"I'd like to. The only women I've met since arriving in New York are my colleagues. And well, they're my colleagues."

"There are a lot of women in New York. You mustn't have been looking very hard," she says, a touch of incredulity in her voice.

"I haven't been, not really."

He doesn't tell her that he only seems to cross paths with married women or with very young women. He is in his nineties – for all that he doesn't look it – and there is no way he would court a twenty-year-old. They are like children in his eyes. But she has clearly done some living, has been married, and is a working woman. Yes, a widow of about thirty is much better. And Susan intrigues him. He feels he needs to give an explanation anyway.

"I was involved with someone during the last of the war, but it didn't work out. We didn't want the same thing. I needed time after that."

She nods in understanding.

"If I were to say I don't have plans, what would be your offer?" she asks, leaning forward

"I'd take you dancing."

Dancing, back in his youth, had been very formal. It was about courting. He remembers Nikola asking him to dance shortly after the Experiment, shocking James, Helen and John, shocking _him_ , but Nigel didn't back down from the dare. On the contrary, he upped the ante by kissing Nikola in front of the others, surprising him. After that... He shakes himself. It isn't the right time for thinking of Nikola, especially not when thinking of him makes him both sad and aroused. But dancing is important, even if the activity is now less meaningful as it once was. Or its meaning has changed. Now, it can be done just for fun.

"I love dancing," Susan says with a smile and a gleam in her eyes. She is saying yes.

+++

"How did you find me?"

John looks into Nikola's eyes, dark and red-rimmed, at the splashes of blood on his clothes.

"I knew what to look for," he says quietly in answer to Nikola's vampiric growl.

"Why are you here?" Nikola snarls.

"You should leave, move out while you still can."

"I'm not done," Nikola rumbles, dark and low.

Part of John understands. But another part, the one who loves Helen and James and is friends with Nigel and Nikola, is hurting for his friend.

"I will come here, every month, at the beginning of each month. Find me when you're ready to leave."

Nikola doesn't answer, and John flashes away, his heart heavy.

+++

There is something about this man. Susan isn't sure what, but he is unlike any other person she has ever met. And as a nurse, she has dealt with a great variety of people. She agreed to meet with him because she is intrigued. He is open, and yet is also clearly holding back, which is an odd combination. People tend to be either extremely private or very open. Or perhaps she is just being silly and only said yes because she couldn't resist his accent. She shakes her head ruefully, before exiting the bathroom to rejoin Nigel.

He rises from the table when she arrives. Their dessert still hasn't been served.

"We seem to have the time for a dance."

The music is midway between slow and fast, which suits her as slow would be too intimate, and fast inconvenient for conversation. She steps a bit closer to him than is considered proper and wraps her arm around his shoulder. His eyebrows shoot up briefly. He isn't the only one who can do surprises, and she isn't a child anymore.

Nigel has to admit than he has a thing for fearlessness. Helen, who never listens to any convention or anyone and just does as she will. Nikola, who takes risks as he breathes, never sparing a moment's thoughts for possible consequences – stupid, reckless man. Jeanette, who chose to fight back when her country was invaded, even knowing it would likely cost her her life. And now Susan, who is being forward, clearly not wanting to be outdone, or being thought of as meek.

He can tell she has her own secrets. Little things about her don't add up. That is all right. It's not as if he has told her that he can turn invisible, works with strange beings and used to rob banks.

"You haven't told me what it is you research exactly."

"Conditions too rare to be treated at a regular hospital." He doesn't like making it sound as if abnormals are sick, in need of treatment, but it makes for a good cover story. "I make drugs adapted to each patient's needs." That part is actually the truth. "If you ever come across such a person, you can direct them to me."

Susan nods. There is something in Nigel's voice, as if he is trusting her with an important responsibility. She isn't certain what conditions are enough to be referred to his place of work, but she feels confident that she will recognize it if she sees it.

+++

Nigel is lying in bed, looking up at the ceiling, going over the events of the night. He thinks it went rather well. Susan's dress was beautiful, if somewhat out of fashion compared to what the other women were wearing. But Susan held her head high. If she was ashamed, and Nigel rather thought she wasn't, she didn't show it. She is a good dancer and it is obvious that she has enjoyed their evening.

While they met at the club at the start of the evening, Susan allowed him to accompany her back home. Perhaps she was expecting a good night kiss, but he felt it was too soon, which is probably something straight from his youth. They have agreed to meet again for lunch on Friday.

He realizes just as he is falling asleep that he has yet to reply to Helen.

+++

He tracks them down, those responsible for killing his people. John had been right about moving, but Nikola had been truthful. He still isn't done. He has left a letter for John at their meeting point, written in a code from when the Five were whole, literally as well as metaphorically. John can track him down if he wants. Nikola rather hopes he would. It would make travelling faster.

Helen would be appalled, James would add him to his hunt list. And Nigel. Nikola stops breathing for a moment. Nigel... Nigel would be... Nikola can't think. He remembers kisses and strong arms around him, invisible touches and shared warmth. Nigel would... Nikola thinks Nigel would push him away. He's a monster now, not simply walking the line anymore. When the realisation hits him, that to avenge his people he has sacrificed his love, he sinks to the floor of his hotel room and cries.

+++

Temperatures have risen with the arrival of spring, timid leaves unfolding on the trees. Nights are still cold though, and Nigel wraps his coat tighter around him. He is used to dealing with the cold, to some extent, but he has usually avoided using his power when it's bloody freezing outside. He is on his way to Susan's apartment; she has invited him to dinner and he is very much looking forward to it.

He hasn't had any doubt what the evening might lead to, but if he had, they would have disappeared seeing Susan's dress. She has always been elegant when they went out. She is now as well, but her dress is meant to draw his attention to her body in a way the ones she has previously worn didn't.

His eyes snap back to her face when he realizes he's staring. Susan simply smirks at him as she ushers him in, her eyes mischievous, looking very pleased with herself. He removes his coat, and she hangs it by the door. Her apartment is pleasantly decorated, understated and warm. Most of the furniture and trinkets that adorn her living space are simple, with a few fancier pieces here and there.

Susan seems to be waiting for his appraisal. He faces her again.

"Beautiful."

She blushes slightly, perhaps because she thinks he may not be thinking about the flat. He has chosen to be deliberately confusing.

The meal she has prepared tastes good. Nothing is overly ambitious, but it feels... like coming home. They speak about everything that has gone on during the week, at her job, in the world, and some general anecdotes about his work. The anticipation is high in the room. Nigel helps Susan clear the table. She insists he shouldn't because he is a guest, but he insists friends help each other.

Susan puts the empty dishes and plates in the sink and fills them with water.

"Friends, huh?" She is teasing, he knows.

"Not just friends," he says, before leaning down and kissing her.

She immediately responds, wrapping her arms around his shoulders. She even deepens the kiss and he smiles, pleased that she wants to take charge. He'd like to take her in his arms and carry her to the bedroom but he doesn't know where it is.

Susan breaks their kiss and runs her hands down his arms, then grips one of his hands, tugging on it so that he follows her.

They kiss again once they are in her bedroom. Susan is loosening his tie and unbuttoning his shirt when he realizes he'd feel more comfortable if he were honest with her first. This is a new step and she needs to know what she is getting into.

"Susan, I need..."

"Yes," she breathes, cupping him through his trousers.

"No..." She raises her eyebrows at him. "I mean, yes, but there's something I have to tell you first."

"You're not married, are you?"

"No! No, I've never been married."

"Then I don't care about anything else you might say."

She kisses him again, effectively preventing him from replying. He probably should insist anyway, but he gives up because he desires her so much.

There's some urgency in Susan's movements but at times, there may be some signs of worry in her eyes and on her face, as if she thinks he may not like what he sees or her attitude. She doesn't let such feelings stop her however, and forges on. Undressing him. A defiant look in her eyes when he watches her, daring him to be anything less than fully appreciative. She is beautiful, lightly muscled, curves in all the right places.

Susan isn't passive. In fact, he gets the feeling she would like to be completely in charge, which is something that rarely suits him.

Nigel falls in love all over again at the way she responds to his touch. He's too far gone, his attention splitting between all the different ways he can make contact with her skin. Susan keeps him from pulling out, telling him it's okay, as she slips a hand between them to help herself along.

+++

Nikola rises from the bed, uncaring about his naked state. John isn't even looking at him anyway. His eyes are closed, but he isn't relaxed. He hasn't been since he showed up at Nikola's hotel room. It hadn't taken long at all for John to track Nikola down. Which probably means Druitt got to their rendezvous point weeks early. Nikola refused to open the door, turning what he thought was room service away, only to have John flash into the room to find him sobbing as he sat on the floor against the bed. He attacked John then; he remembers that much. Not with claws and fangs, never against a friend, which John is somehow turning into again. Their struggle led to an angry coupling, which John still bears the marks of – in the form of bite marks, human bite marks. The stabs and other knife wounds have of course healed almost instantly, no trace of them left on Nikola's skin save for dried blood. It looks as if someone has been murdered in the room though, but that's all right. He'll just have to give a bonus to whoever comes to clean his room next

As Nikola thinks back over the night and the proposition he made to the other man, he searches inside his bag for his cigarettes. He lights one and takes a drag, his back to John, before turning around.

"Will you do it then?" he asks, walking back towards the bed.

"I didn't know you still smoked."

"It doesn't affect me, yes. Like wine. I just like the movement." Sitting with his back against the headboard, he stretches his legs as he takes another drag, deliberately slowing down his action.

He drops the pack and the lighter between them, not quite offering, but not quite holding back either. John doesn't move.

"Not my type of targets," he finally says.

"Does it really make a difference who you kill and rip apart?"

Nikola asks honestly, turning his head towards John. John seems to hesitate for a moment, and then he shakes his head. He takes a cigarette, lights it, and turns to look Nikola in the eye.

"You've got yourself a deal."

+++

Nigel, resting on his side, looks on as Susan stretches, a smile on her face. But she becomes more serious as she turns towards him.

"What did you want to tell me earlier?"

Her question comes as a surprise. There are no easy words to explain though. So, taking a deep breath, he fades.

Surprise and fear flash on her face. Then she pokes him in the shoulder.

"I'm still here," he says.

Then her eyes fill with wonder, and he lets himself become visible again.

"Amazing. Can all the people you work with do that?"

"No. They can do other things though, or look different. Others don't have any extraordinary abilities."

"Why did you think it was important to tell me before?"

"Well, I thought you ought to know that I'm not entirely human."

"That doesn't change who you are as a person. Is this ability a family thing?"

"No. I wasn't even born with this gift."

"No?"

"It'll sound like a crazy story, but I swear that everything I'm about to tell you is the truth."

+++

There must be other hunters, backed by governments. Nikola briefly wonders if they are as efficient as the terrible team he makes with John. The two of them can go anywhere. Their enemies never get advance warning. Or mercy. Whether by claws or a knife, all their stories end the same way.

+++

"It's a beautiful place," Helen says, eyes shaded by fashionable sunglasses. The house is painted white. The size is modest, but enough for two adults and a child, should Nigel and his future wife choose to have one. If they do, Helen is quite certain that the baby would inherit Nigel's gift. She exits the car while Nigel does the same on the other side.

Nigel's fiancée walks out of the house at that moment. She extends her hand to Helen.

"Hello! I'm Susan. Welcome to our home!"

"I'm delighted to finally meet you."

"I was looking forward to meeting you as well based what Nigel told me about you."

Helen looks back to Nigel whose only response is to usher them in.

"Would you like something to drink?" Susan asks.

"Yes, please."

They settle on the back porch. Helen asks Nigel about the abnormal community in Louisiana, Susan adding some information as well, but even as she listens intently, part of her wonders what she can do to mend the differences between Nigel and James. Nigel hasn't invited James to his wedding, and James refused to come despite her insistence that he do so anyway. She can understand why Nigel hasn't invited James, as he hasn't answered any letter Nigel has sent him since he settled in the United States. It all seems so childish to her, a fit of cruel pride that tears apart what remains of the Five. James is angered by Nigel's departure, almost in the wake of Nikola's disappearance, but snapping at the last of their trio serves no purpose.

Susan excuses herself after a while and disappears back into the house. Nigel is the one who breaks the silence.

"It's highly unlikely Susan can have children," he says quietly.

"Perhaps there are things that can be done."

"Perhaps. After my relationship with Jeanette, I thought I wanted children, a family, but it turns out what I wanted more than anything was companionship."

She nods. Nigel has never been one to live for his work.

"You know what that means though," he says

"We may not be able to retrieve the blood," she replies.

"Exactly."

"But there is no telling how long you will live."

"I feel... No, I don't feel as if I'm growing older, but I don't think I will linger on much longer."

"What makes you say that?"

"Gut feeling."

+++

The wedding takes place a few days later. James shows up the day before the ceremony – clearly having weighted his pride against Helen's fury over his absence from such an event, and deciding their working relationship had to be preserved – but he and Nigel remain cool towards each other.

The priest is an abnormal, as are most of the guests, and Helen would bet that some of those who look human are not. They could be empaths or telepaths, or have any number of other gifts. Susan's bridesmaid is a quinterran, with characteristic observant slit-pupilled eyes. The ceremony is swift, and the party that follows exuberant. Helen gathers that the marquee is situated on a property that belongs to abnormals. She dances with James and it feels like goodbye; Nigel and Susan are laughing together.

+++

The heat is stifling. Flies flitter over the two dead bodies that already litter the floor. Soon, there will be a third corpse in the room but, at Nikola's insistence, John is torturing the man before he kills him.

"Please," he says, turning towards him, "stop him."

"You sought to exterminate my people."

With this simple answer, the man understands that, in this instance, the most dangerous man in the room isn't Jack the Ripper.

+++

There are two letters in the mail that day. One from Canada, one from England. He hesitates over which to pick up first briefly before he goes for James's. His relationship with the other man has warmed again after the wedding, James's presence and their talking to each other that day doing a lot to mend their differences of opinion. The letter reveals that James thinks Druitt was at the Sanctuary, in his office, looking for something, and James is worried it may have been Helen's address, as he had found his address book slightly moved one morning. Nigel thinks she can take care of herself even if Druitt does show up at her place.

Helen's letter reveals she is finally done with getting everything important organized at her new Sanctuary. There is a colour photograph of a grand Gothic building.

"That's quite a place," Susan says, leaning on him and looking over his shoulder.

"We could go visit," Nigel suggests, turning his head to look at his wife of more than two years.

"It's a long way, but maybe next spring?"

Nigel nods. He loves the warmth of the abnormal community in Louisiana, but he misses seeing the others. He keeps in touch with Helen and James. However, it's been more than five years since Nikola's been seen or heard of. Nigel's worry has turned into a mix of sadness and betrayal, and a physical ache in his chest whenever he thinks of him.

+++

Helen has hired an empath to help her take care of the creatures who have found sanctuary at her new home. She is happy with the place, but even with Rachel, it feels all too empty, with them both being run ragged by too much work on the maintenance of the house. She doesn't want a large staff like at the London Sanctuary, but it looks like she is going to need more hands on deck if she is ever to be able to spend more than thirty minutes at a time in her laboratory. She loves running her own House, but she's not willing to entirely give up her scientific endeavours.

It is time to look into recruitment.

+++

It rains more in Louisiana than in London, thick drops that soak a person to the bone far more quickly than do the lighter English showers. On the upside, it is less cold in winter. Susan sleeps peacefully next to him but rest eludes him. The tumult of the downpour always wakes him again whenever he falls asleep. He usually doesn't have such trouble sliding into slumber but tonight everything seems deafening. He tries once more to fall asleep. The sound changes; it becomes more of a thunderous pounding. Nigel starts upright when he realizes he's actually hearing someone banging on the door. In the middle of the night. In a rainstorm.

He rises silently, careful not to wake Susan. To no avail as she opens her eyes and looks at him as he reaches for the bedside table.

"Nigel, what's wrong?" she asks, voice rough from sleep

"I think there's someone at the door. I have to check it out. You stay here."

Susan looks rebellious, crossing her arms over her chest, but she makes no move to get out of bed while he gets the handgun out of the drawer. It's unlikely that an enemy would be knocking on the door rather than kicking it down, but there could still be trouble. Normal folk kind of trouble. Nigel is absolutely unprepared for what awaits him on the other side of the door.

Nikola, hair plastered to his forehead, his clothes drenched. His claws and fangs are out and his eyes dark, but he looks more pitiful than dangerous. Until his gaze focuses on something behind Nigel and Nikola licks his lips.

Without looking back, Nigel brings the gun up. "Susan, get back into the bedroom." He is unsurprised that she followed him and knows she would probably still like to protest but common sense beats her rebellious spirit and he hears her retreat.

"Mate, don't make me shoot you."

Nikola looks back at him, staring into his eyes as he breathes harshly. After a few moments which feel like forever to Nigel, Nikola's features become human again.

"I'm sorry. Can I come in?"

"Of course, you bloody idiot," Nigel says, moving out of the way. "Most people call ahead though, or write."

Nikola looks for a moment as if the concept is entirely foreign to him, something that never would have entered his mind. Then he simply shrugs.

A puddle is forming around Nikola as his clothes drip onto the floor.

"Take these off," he says, gesturing at Nikola's garments. "You're ruining the rug," he adds with a grin to belay the sting of his words.

"I'd prefer blood to warm blankets," Nikola replies, even as he starts to fight with his wet clothing.

Nigel knows a hungry vampire when he sees one, and if Nikola is asking, no doubt he is at the edge of his control.

"Stay here; I'll be right back."

Nikola nods, struggling with the buttons of his shirt. Nigel's footsteps recede down the hallway. He hopes Nigel comes back soon. He concentrates on his clothing, trying not to get distracted by the smell of warm fresh human blood in the house. He would never attack Nigel, but he can't say the same for the woman he can hear pacing in one of the rooms down the hallway. She had looked tasty. He strives to keep his promise not to feed on humans, but on the days that he is starving, it is increasingly difficult not to attack someone.

When Nigel comes back, Nikola is down to his shorts. Nigel ushers him into the living room and grabs a throw off of the back of the couch to drape around Nikola. Nigel hands him a vial full of blood. It's not much but it'll get him through the night without him attacking anybody.

"Come on, drink this."

Nikola knows it's Nigel's. Very smart of him to not offer himself up to be bitten. Still, it's human blood, and he's never actually drunk human blood. He has tasted it before, but licking a paper cut or a similar insignificant wound doesn't count as feeding; a human might do so as well. This however is different.

"Nikola, there is no other blood here. I am not throwing you out on your arse into the night, but I'm hardly going to leave you alone here while I go get blood, and I won't send Susan out in this downpour either. So just bloody drink!"

Nikola briefly closes his eyes, before opening them again. He stares at Nigel as he brings the vial to his lips. The blood coats his tongue and it's like nothing he has ever imagined. His nerves are tingling. Animal blood just doesn't compare. A moan escapes him as he savours the last mouthful, which has come all too soon.

"This is sort of flattering, if also somewhat disturbing," Nigel says with a small smile on his lips. Then Nikola is wrapped into a hug, Nigel holding tight onto him.

"Would it have killed you to write?" he grumbles into Nikola's neck. Nikola returns the hug equally fiercely.

Nigel doesn't say anything about Nikola's erection pushing against his own crotch. There's nothing to be said; Nikola's just fed. Nikola doesn't say anything when Nigel asks him where he's been, and finally steps back when faced with Nikola's silence. Nigel eyes him carefully.

"You look exhausted," Nigel says, looking at him more closely than Nikola would like. He certainly feels bone tired and, if he is visibly tired as well, it must indeed be extreme. Nigel knows how much it takes to put him in such a state.

"We'll talk tomorrow. You can sleep here."

Nikola nods silently. Then curiosity gets the better of him.

"Who is she?"

"Susan is my wife."

Nikola is numb. Nigel must be expecting a kind of reaction from him but he has nothing.

"I'll see you tomorrow, Nikola." Nigel pops back into the room a second after leaving him.

"And don't you dare leave in the dead of the night. I'll track you down and kill you with my bare hands if you do."

Nikola can't help the grin that spreads upon his face.

"Wouldn't dream of it."

Nigel shakes his head, fond exasperation on his features.

Nikola holds the grin until he is sure Nigel isn't going to come back. Then he sinks onto the couch and curls on his side, clinging to the afghan. Nigel is married. Nikola hadn't thought that his hanging around Jack the Ripper and killing people would cost him Nigel this way. That Nigel would be horrified and reject him once he learned of what happened, yes, he had expected this. But never to find Nigel attached to another, never to lose him simply because he is too late. They have never made any promise to each other, but over the years, as neither of them seriously considered anyone else, somewhere along the lines, Nikola has thought the situation would never change. But clearly Nigel felt differently.

Nikola shuts his eyes tightly, but the bitter tears escape anyway.

+++

"Who is he?" Susan asks as soon as he enters their bedroom.

"Nikola. I've talked about him."

"The one of your group who disappeared during World War II? What is he? He looked..."

"He's a vampire and he can control electricity," Nigel says, sitting on the bed.

"A vampire? Isn't that dangerous?" Susan asks, settling beside him, legs folded under her.

"Nikola doesn't bite humans. He feeds on animal plasma with added nutrients. I'll arrange for some tomorrow."

"He looked hungry tonight, no?"

"I gave him blood."

"Your blood? But you said..."

"He didn't bite me. I drew some to give him. It was the most practical thing to do tonight. Look, Susan, Nikola is going to be staying with us for a while. He's had a rough time of it and I won't throw him out, not until he's better at least."

Susan considers the matter for a moment, and then nods slowly. "If you think it's safe for him to stay." She doesn't know the other man, but if Nigel is vouching for him, she can welcome him into her home.

"I do," Nigel says, nodding resolutely. "I'm sure you'll like him; he's a lot of fun."

Susan moves to get back under the covers. She likes Helen a lot and James is okay. Her husband's other friend can't be all that bad either.

"As long as he doesn't try to eat me," she says, with a wicked grin. Nigel shakes his head, but he is smiling too as he slides into bed.

+++

Nikola is curled up on his side on the couch, and the throw has fallen off of him during the night. Nikola's vampire metabolism allows him to withstand the cold instead of being disturbed by it.

Susan peeks around him to get a look at the sleeping man.

"He looks very young," she whispers.

Nigel is briefly annoyed that Susan now knows what Nikola looks like in his sleep. This is stupid; Nigel can't possibly be the only one privy to that knowledge.

"You should see for some clothes to lend him as the pile near the front door is probably still wet," Susan says pointedly, but with amusement glinting in her eyes.

+++

Susan is putting away the last of the dishes from breakfast when she hears footsteps. She turns around. Of course, it is her husband's friend – her houseguest. She would have heard the front door open if Nigel were back.

They stare at each other in silence. Nigel's clothes are both too short and too large for his tall slender friend. She thinks that his gaze flickers to her neck. Nigel has said he isn't dangerous, but now she isn't so sure she believes him. Still if there was danger, he would have asked her to come with him.

Susan recovers her manners, even though he continues to stare at her.

"We weren't properly introduced last night. I'm Susan Griffin."

"I know. Nigel told me." He smirks, before he adds: "I'm Nikola Tesla."

"Like..." Then reality strikes her. "No, you're him. I mean..."

He chuckles. "Yes, I am." He sobers then. "I assumed Nigel has gone for some blood."

"Yes, he has. Do you... do you need anything else?"

"I wouldn't say no to some coffee."

She would like to know more, she thinks, as she boils water for a cup, but asking would probably be rude. She gets an answer of sorts when he starts to peel an orange.

"You can eat," she says before she can stop herself.

"Yes, I can. However, I don't get much out of it."

He sits down at the kitchen table, the piece of furniture a barrier between them.

"How did you meet Nigel?" he asks, shredding the peel into smaller and smaller pieces.

"At a restaurant in New York," she replies. His fingers are oddly entrancing, like they're hiding something, acting as a shield for him. She's not sure she wants to know more about why he's doing this – if he is indeed doing it on purpose – but as long as he maintains civilized conversation, she isn't going to complain. "His was the only table with a free seat."

Tesla shakes his head ruefully, making Susan wonders what he knows about her husband to react so. The way he is eating the orange, the noises he makes as he sucks the juice into his mouth, would be suggestive if it weren't for the fact he seems completely oblivious, apparently lost in some memory or another. Like her husband, he must be about a century old. Neither looks their true age – and Tesla looks younger than Nigel by a good ten years. Yet it is strange, the way she can see their age reflected in their eyes, as she witnesses now with Nikola, the toils of a hundred years clear in his blue gaze.

"I forgot to offer congratulations to Nigel last night," he says. She has no idea what he is talking about. "For getting married. Congratulations." He's smiling, but it looks forced. She wonders if he disapproves of her somehow, if he thinks she isn't good enough for his friend.

"Is there a place in this house where I could set up a lab?"

Susan hasn't seen such a question coming. How long is he planning to stay?

"Well, Nigel has his lab in the back but I don't think you need the same kind of lab." He shakes his head. "There's the garden shed; we don't use it." She winces then because stuffing him there is hardly generous but he just laughs before abruptly stopping and tensing. She hears the door as he stands up and leaves the kitchen.

"Good morning, Nikola." Nigel's voice floats from the hallway. His tone is neutral, too carefully neutral.

Susan remains in the kitchen. Her husband's friend staying here, she can accept, but she's not going to help him going over his war trauma. Truthfully, she's not sure she even could. Hopefully Nigel can though, and it is her job to be there for him.

+++

It doesn't take long for Nigel to realize that Nikola is in a far worse state than he previously thought. Together, they set up a lab in the garden shed for Nikola's experiments. Nigel had immediately agreed that this would be a good idea, thinking that it would do Nikola good to experiment again. It's not as if he or Susan were using the space in the first place, and it makes him smile to imagine that there is mad science going on in his backyard again, like so long ago.

It doesn't quite turn out as expected. Nikola hunkers down in his newly-built lab, only coming out at night to retire to the living room couch. He seems to be genuinely happy to see Nigel whenever he wanders into the lab. Some of it is forced cheerfulness that anyone could see right through, but there is affection and pleasure underneath. After a few days, though, it becomes obvious that Nikola is doing his damnedest to avoid Susan, and when he is in her company, he appears to be cautious – which is utterly ridiculous because out of the two, the one who should be scared of the other is Susan. Nigel has no idea why Nikola is acting like this and can't even come up with an idea as to what could be the reason behind such behaviour

It is early February – the rain hasn't abated – when Nigel finally has an idea. Nikola never goes into town, staying on his and Susan's property, as if the rest of the world has ceased to exist to him. Weeks ago, Nigel surmised this was so because Nikola doesn't want to meet anybody, doesn't want to interact with people, with anyone other than Nigel. Then, one Tuesday, when Matthew Roberts has come on his weekly pilgrimage to pick up the medicine Nigel makes to allow the man's clan to integrate into human society, Nikola – who didn't leave his lab the night before – walks in through the back door. Nigel tenses, but to his utter surprise, Nikola joins them to introduce himself. He doesn't extend his hand to shake, which is the proper protocol with Matthew's species. Nigel is actually glad for Nikola making small talk because he's just been reduced to speechlessness. After a couple of minutes, Nikola takes his leave and wanders in the direction of the kitchen, no doubt to get some blood.

Thinking about the event when he lies in bed later at night, he still isn't sure what to think of it. When an idea finally springs up, he refuses to let it take root because of its implications. He doesn't want to believe that of Nikola. Still, even as sleep finally claims him, he resolves to test his theory in the following days, to disprove it, he tells himself.

+++

Reuniting with Nigel hasn't exactly gone as expected. The first thing of course is that Nigel being married came as a complete surprise. Outside of Helen and John – and they all know how that turned out – Nikola has never considered any of them to be the marrying kind. In fact, Helen has never struck him as such either, only John really. Before he became Jack the Ripper of course. Even though Nigel never made him any promises, nor had he to him, Nikola didn't realize that Nigel wanted a family. Not that he and his wife have children yet, but surely they must be planning to. Nigel's new – to Nikola – inclination must have occurred since the last time they saw each other, during those years Nikola spent hunting and killing Nazis, first on his own in the land of his birth, and then across the world with John.

Despite everything, Nikola's problem with Susan isn't that she is Nigel's wife. Nikola really can't begrudge his friend happiness. No, the reason he mistrusts Susan is because she is human. The Nazis were human, bigger monsters than any abnormal he's ever encountered, even the more violent ones. Of course, Susan appears to be very compassionate, and seems to be fine with abnormals, even welcoming him under her roof. He knows she isn't giving Nigel grief over his presence in their house. With his vampire hearing, he'd have heard it if that were the case. And she can't have argued against his presence at any other time because Nigel hasn't left the house since that first morning when he went to fetch blood for Nikola. Figuring out if that is standard behaviour for him has been difficult. Of course, Nigel spends a significant amount of time in his lab making medicine for the abnormal community of the area and of even further away. He knows some of it is shipped to New Orleans. When he'd asked Nigel about it a few days ago, Nigel simply answered that he avoids getting out. Still, Nikola had the impression he wasn't being entirely truthful.

+++

Susan has been with Nigel long enough to be able to tell when he is up to something. Of course, she also knows better than to ask as he will most likely simply deflect the question with a mysterious smile, or sometimes a mischievous grin. So she does as she's been asked – she'll know soon enough anyway – and prepares a dinner for five. She's not convinced that Nigel can talk his friend into actually sitting down with them. He's rarely had dinner with them since he arrived at their home. Perhaps he simply seeks to give them privacy. Or he's avoiding her; he doesn't seem to like her much. Despite Nigel's reassurances, Susan can't help being scared of him, which she knows only serves to encourage predators. The way he sometimes looks at her, as if he's wondering what her blood would taste like, is highly unnerving. She's glad he doesn't share dinner with them most days. As used as she's become to the way of many abnormals, seeing someone drink blood disgusts her.

Quinterrans do not have any special dietary requirements; they do have a marked preference for barely cooked meat though. Nikola, if he can be convinced to leave his lab to join them for dinner, will eat human food as well. All in all, Nigel's request doesn't translate into more work for her therefore accepting costs her very little. Cooking for five isn't all more time consuming than cooking for two.

+++

Nigel really hopes as he welcomes Rein and her human husband into their home that his theory won't be proved correct. Deep in his heart however, he is certain that it will and it pains him that Nikola has come to this, knowing how much he must have been hurt, how much he must have been psychologically damaged by the war and its aftermath for that to have come to pass.

Susan takes over, directing their friends into the living room, as he goes outside to talk Nikola out of the garden shed turned makeshift lab. He knocks on the door, even though Nikola must have heard him coming. The sound of Nikola's voice comes through the door, but Nigel can't make out the words. It didn't sound alarmed however, so Nigel figures it's safe to come in.

He can't help the fond smile that spreads on his lips as he walks in and takes in the sight of Nikola, with sleeves rolled up and hair standing on end. The half-vampire spares him a glance, but as he turns back towards his experiment, Nigel catches the grin unfurling on the other man's lips.

"I hope this can be put on hold for a few hours," he says, gesturing to what Nikola is doing.

"Why?"

"Susan and I have a couple of friends over and I would like you to join us for dinner."

"Nigel, I don't even eat."

"You don't _need_ to but mate, I've seen you eat in social settings dozens of times so you're going to have to come up with a better excuse than that. Or better yet, just bring your bloody arse over to the house. Besides, our guests won't even care if you drink your usual fare in front of them. And I have a couple of good bottles of wine out."

"Really?" It's amusing how much Nikola perks up at the mere mention of wine when he hasn't felt the effects of alcohol in almost seventy years. "What..."

Nigel tuts disapprovingly at him and shakes his head. "For that, you have to come inside."

Nikola glares at him for a few seconds, before turning his head, looking away. Nigel is just about to give up and retreat when Nikola swivels on his feet to face him anew.

"All right, I'll come. But it'd better be excellent wine."

"It is; I guarantee you that it is."

"I'll be the judge of that," Nikola replies, and Nigel is glad to see him smirking.

+++

Nigel's assessment that his guest would be unfazed by Nikola drinking blood in front of them has given him the impression that they were abnormals. However, as it turns out, he has guessed wrong. The woman is indeed an abnormal, some slit-pupil being that Nikola has never come across before. But the man Nigel introduces as her husband is human and Nikola can't help the way his shoulders tense. From the corner of his eye, he notices that Nigel has spotted the move, his eyes narrowing. Then the frown clears from his face. Nikola knows better than to think Nigel hasn't figured it out. His gift of invisibility has only heightened his naturally perceptive nature. However, in a bid to make Nigel doubt his aptitude at reading him, and to delay if not all together avoid an unpleasant conversation, Nikola does his best not to let his caution show, to be civil. He even engages the humans, both Rein's husband and Susan, in conversation.

Once Nigel's guests leave, sometime after dinner, Nikola goes as far as helping Nigel and Susan clear everything. It's all to no avail, because when Susan retires for the night, Nigel doesn't follow and Nikola can tell he means business.

+++

Nigel's heart sunk before dinner as his suspicions were confirmed. Although Nikola altered his behaviour, his desperation to hide his feelings from Nigel obvious, Nigel saw enough to come to the conclusion Nikola now feels distrustful of humans and considers that he must be on his guard whenever he is near one, despite his undeniable advantage of preternatural strength and reflexes.

Nikola retreats to the living room, as if he's failed to notice Nigel wants to talk to him, which Nigel knows isn't the case. Undeterred, Nigel follows him in, hot on his heels. Nikola lets himself fall on the couch, covering his eyes with his hand.

"You know, I really wish you would move into the guest bedroom instead of sleeping here."

Nikola removes his hand, frowning at him.

"Well, I... just don't want to, you know, actually move in."

"Nikola, the idea behind a guest bedroom is that guests stay in it, no matter if they spend a night or three years there. And besides, I don't think you've made any plans to leave for the moment, have you?"

"No, I haven't, but I don't want to overstay my welcome."

"I'm the one who will decide when you are no longer welcome. And we Five have to stick together. It would be easier to be more welcoming, and for you to feel more welcomed, if you would actually not act as if humans are a threat to you, which they're not."

"Are they not?" Nikola asks softly with a tilt of his head.

"You cannot believe that!" It is rightly startling, the honesty shining in Nikola's eyes. He truthfully believes humans are a danger to him.

"They hurt us," Nikola replies, and the even tone of his voice is more disquieting than anger or denial would be.

"Nikola, they can't hurt you," Nigel says gently.

"Can't they?" Nikola replies, now more defiant. "Vampires were exterminated by humans, Nigel. We're not invincible."

"Nikola, where... when did you begin to think like that?"

"I...It's... You know."

"What happened during the last war was horrific, but it wasn't about humans and abnormals."

"But it was. They killed anyone they considered abnormals, subhumans."

Arguing with this is difficult, and Nigel can see how Nikola could think that, how his being a foreigner where he worked led to his being viewed with suspicion. And that could only lead to hurt, and further, to resentment, warping his view of the world.

Nikola speaks again before Nigel can think of an answer.

"I was with Johnny, you know."

"You mean, you stuck with him?"

Nigel knows that Nikola left England with John in 1944, but he seems to be implying that they kept together, which is odd. They've never got along, not even before Druitt became the Ripper, perhaps even less then actually.

"Not exactly," Nikola replies. "John teleported me home but left immediately after. He came back months later, perhaps even more than that. I lost track of time. If you can believe this, he was worried about me of all things." Nikola chuckles; Nigel is terrified at what state Nikola must have been in that even John was concerned for him. "We encountered each other later – no need to go into the logistics, that's not important; what is is that we decided to work together."

Nigel's breath hitches, his heart hammering in his chest. Working with Jack the Ripper is never a good idea, although Nigel can't deny the help he'd been during the hunt for Adam Worth – though Nigel spent this time wondering if he was going to be stabbed in the back – and in Normandy.

"Nikola, what did you do?" Nigel asks, striving to mask the fear in his voice.

"They were monsters, worse than Jack the Ripper or a vampire. So I killed them, and Johnny helped me. I hunted."

"Did you feed on them?"

"No!" And it was Nikola's turn to look horrified. "I kept my promise. The only human blood I have ever drunk is yours, on the day I arrived here. I merely slashed and stabbed with my claws. Johnny still was the one who did most of the killings, as well as torture. He really does seem to enjoy that. And better for him to be unleashed on abhorrent war criminals than on poor unfortunate women everywhere."

"How much time did you spend doing that?"

"Three years, something along those lines."

"God, Nikola..." There really is no word, really is nothing he can say to that. He is actually surprised that Nikola isn't even far more gone after spending three years murdering people with Jack the Ripper at his side.

"You know, I think it was actually beneficial to Johnny to spend some time with me."

"How so?" Nigel asks, unable to keep the wariness out of his voice now.

"He doesn't have to hold back with me. He can't hurt me, not lastingly anyway. And it's good, because once he's indulged his bloodlust, he is actually..."

"Actually what?" Nigel asks when Nikola remains silent.

"Well, sane isn't exactly the right word, but he is... still who he was. He loves Helen and James and poetry and that ridiculous tea you Englishmen drink."

Nigel glares at him for the tea remark, Nikola simply giving him a dazzling grin in response. What Nikola has just said is the most troubling circumstance about Druitt, as well as the reason they all failed to suspect him of committing those horrifying crimes back in the day. For all that he came to love killing people and cutting them to pieces, he is still the man who became their friend. He still is one of the Five. And in a strange way, he tried to help Nikola out, by killing people, by taking it upon himself to do these things so Nikola didn't have to, or not as much, while Nikola posited himself as a target so innocents wouldn't have to suffer at the hands of Jack the Ripper. This should be a perversion of friendship; instead, it reads as an unbreakable bond taken way too far. Except that it very probably helped them both, and it makes Nigel strangely grateful.

"You slept together, didn't you?" He can't help the remark, because any of them spending time together seems to inevitably lead to that.

"Jealous? Don't be. You have no reason to be. I could. You love your wife after all."

Nigel glances back towards the hallway, in the direction of the bedroom.

"Don't worry; she's asleep," Nikola says. "Anyway, you know what it's like. Being able to be who you really are when you're with someone. As Johnny and I can be together. I can shift when we have sex. And I'm perfectly clear who he is, just as he knows who I am. There's no illusion, no lies there. It's a comfort," Nikola finishes softly.

"Nikola, if this was comfort you wanted, what didn't come to see me? Or hell, even Helen?"

"Helen would have lectured me. Probably anyway. And it wasn't comfort I wanted, it was revenge. And to kill them before they killed me or someone else like me."

"Not all humans are a threat though, Nikola," Nigel says, leading the conversation back to where it began. He can't blame Nikola for going Nazi-hunting, not after what they did to his people, nor can he blame him for taking John with him, because he's certainly someone to have on one's side when killing people.

"Somewhere deep down I know that. But those in power, they destroy, and they inspire others to do so as well."

"Perhaps," Nigel acquiesces because in this moment, it is best to concede the point. "But Susan isn't like that. She cares about people. What matters to her is who they are. When I revealed my abnormality to her, she simply took it in stride."

Nikola tilts his head, paying close attention to his words.

"I'm not asking you to make peace with humanity as a whole right this very minute, simply to realize that my wife is no threat to you in any way."

Nikola's eyes blaze, lit by an inner fire, and his friend steps right into his personal space.

"Do you mean that?" he whispers, from a couple of inches away.

"Nikola, I can't. I still love you; I'll always will. But I can't."

"Because you're married," Nikola states with certainly, his tone flat, as he steps back.

"No, not because of that. Because of how you are now."

Nikola turns away sharply, shoulders slumping and hands fisted at his side. "I know. I always knew it would come to this. Please go."

"What are you going to do?" Nigel can't help asking before he gives in to his friend's desire to be left alone.

"Sleep. Just sleep."

+++

Nikola has now been living in their home for more than a year. After the dinner with Rein and her husband, he finally moved in the guest bedroom, and Susan knows that his move was the result of what Nigel had said to him that night. Susan has no idea what the discussion had entailed. Nikola sequestered himself in his room, only coming out at night, which they could tell by the way the blood supply was always lower in the morning. After a few days, he stopped sulking – for Susan has no doubt that this is what went on – and re-emerged, acting much more friendly towards her. At some point in the months that followed, she stopped being afraid of him. She doesn't know why he is still here – Nigel hasn't told her, if he even knows – but Nikola interferes very little in their daily lives so she doesn't mind much.

+++

Nikola still avoids leaving the house and is extremely annoyed whenever the neighbours are too noisy. Nigel doesn't always hear the sounds Nikola complains about. He knows that far more than the noise, it's the fact that they are humans that disturbs Nikola. Nigel thought that Nikola being friendlier to Susan would extend to other humans with time, but more than a year from Nigel's contrived dinner experiment, Nikola is still only civil to those humans who are attached to abnormals.

The projects conducted in the garden shed – Nikola's lab – are shrouded in secrecy. Nigel can't slip in there to investigate when Nikola isn't working; his friend would smell it if he did, or even hear it from the house and prevent him from doing so. When he visits the lab when Nikola is inside, he can't glean enough from what he sees to deduce what his friend is doing.

He could ask. Of course, he could ask. And he knows Nikola would tell him the truth. He is simply unsure he wants to know that much. Not all of Nikola's past projects were innocuous. He could be working on something perfectly harmless. However, it's been a year and Nikola has shown him nothing and he does tend to produce results much faster than this.

Whoever first said ignorance is bliss was clearly insane. Not knowing gnaws at Nigel relentlessly so much so that he finally decides to ask Nikola. Even if he may end up wishing he didn't know.

Susan is at the hospital for a few hours more at least so now is the perfect time for confronting Nikola. Before leaving the house, he grabs some blood from the fridge, and then steps out onto the porch – it needs a new coat of paint – and down the few steps to the backyard. The smell of freshly mowed grass fills the air. It doesn't bring back any childhood memories, growing up in London as he did, but he loves it, loves living in a place where nature still is more prevalent. It's exactly the place where he's hoped he could raise children in, except Susan can't have any. He wouldn't want to be married to any other woman for the world.

Nigel knocks on the wooden door sharply, and waits for Nikola to open the door or say it's safe to come in. No need to walk in on a dangerous experiment that could be rendered even more hazardous by his walking in at a bad time. This time, Nikola opens the door immediately, so fast in fact that he must have been either about to walk out himself or he must have used his vampiric gift of speed.

"Nigel! Hello. Is it time for dinner?"

Nigel can't help chuckling at the way his friend loses track of time.

"No, it's actually the beginning of the afternoon."

"Oh," Nikola replies, sounding genuinely puzzled. "And what's the date?"

"21st March 1951."

"Is it? Damn, I thought it was March 19."

He chuckles. "At least you have the year right. Here," Nigel says, handing Nikola the blood.

"Thank you."

"You must be working on something that demands all your attention if you've lost a day and didn't even notice hunger." Although Nikola doesn't act as hungry as he should be considering he hasn't fed in almost two days.

"Well..."

"What are you working on, Nikola?" Nigel asks, letting only curiosity through in the tone of his voice.

Nikola hesitates for a moment, uncharacteristically shifting nervously on his feet.

"Come in," he finally says, stepping aside with his arm held away from his body as if to welcome him in even though his back is stiff with tension. The door closes behind him with a finality that would alarm him if he believed Nikola capable of harming him.

"Is it okay to turn on the light?" Nikola may be able to see perfectly in the semi-darkness. Nigel, however, is uncomfortable, having to strain his eyes to see well.

Light bulbs suddenly start shining in different corners of the shed in response to the touch of Nikola's powers. Not about to be deterred by Nikola's parlour tricks, Nigel presses on.

"What are you working on then?"

"I'm alone." Nigel frowns, so Nikola takes it as his cue to keep talking. "The only vampire I mean."

"Part-vampire, Nikola."

"It doesn't matter how much. The Source Blood gave more to me than to the rest of you. No doubt I have vampiric ancestry in my genetic make-up to thank for that." Nikola falls silent. "Nigel, I don't want to be the only vampire on Earth."

"What are you saying, mate?"

"I want to resurrect the vampire species."

The revelation hits him like a stun bolt fired from one of those experimental guns Nikola made for the Sanctuary just prior to the last war.

"You what?"

"You heard me."

"Nikola, you'll need the Blood itself for that."

"Not necessarily. I've been experimenting with my own blood."

"Experimenting on what?"

"Rats. Don't worry. I kill them after."

"That's what you've been eating," Nigel blurts out in sudden realization. Nikola nods almost absent-mindedly. The notion isn't as disgusting as it probably ought to be. In fact, it all but marks one of Nikola's rare attempts at cleaning up after himself rather than letting others clean up his messes.

"Why are you doing this? Do you want children?"

"What?" Nikola looks both sick and horrified at the thought. "Where would you get such an idea?"

"You said you were alone."

"Yes, but trust me, I do not want children, not now, not ever. I just want to share being a vampire with other vampires. And resurrecting the vampire species would be beneficial to humans as well. When vampires ruled the world, there was a golden age of science and culture."

"Humans were also enslaved then. People don't care about science and culture when they're not free."

"The majority of people are being hurt right now, hurt by the ones in power."

"Nikola, there are ways to not be alone. And it comes from sharing your experiences, sharing who you are with others."

"But I can't... you... You're with Susan now."

"Oh Nikola... Nikola, mate, you can talk to me. I'm married, sure, but we're still best friends. Though I may have to reconsider that if you're resurrecting the vampire species to enslave humans."

"You said... I've killed."

"So have I. It's not the past that matters, Nikola; it's the future."

Nikola frowns and looks down, hands curled around the wooden bench, which is splintering under the supernatural pressure.

"You'll always be welcome here, Nikola, as a friend. I'd even help Druitt out if he came to me. But being with you again, mate... You've got to let me help you. Help you look forward to life again. Not plan for a bleak future and the defences you need to build for it." He rests his hand on the troubled man's shoulder and squeezes. "You know where to find me."

It's not until the door has dully clung shut behind him and he has crossed the yard back to the house that Nigel lets the tears which have been prickling at his eyes fall.

+++

Nikola has abandoned his lab for months. While that means he has given up trying to bring back vampires – at least for now – Nigel isn't sure that Nikola spending all his time locked in his room is an improvement. He does occasionally come out to eat dinner with them and to take and put back books from the shelves in the living room. Amazingly, Susan still hasn't uttered any complaints about Nikola's continued presence in their home. She even seems to be concerned about him.

That Nikola has chosen to stay here rather than leave to continue his experiment must be a sign that he realizes the error of his way, Nigel ponders as he prepares the weekly doses of medicine for the various abnormals, and even a few humans, he supplies. He is selecting ingredients from the shelves when there is a soft knock on the door of his lab.

"Come in," he immediately replies. Even before Nikola locked himself away, his visits to Nigel's lab were extremely rare, unlike his visits to Nikola's lab.

Nikola enters the room carefully as Nigel walks towards him, a happy smile on his face he can't quite restrain, whereas Nikola's face is guarded, almost shy.

"Nigel," he begins, "why did we never try to help John?"

Nigel doesn't reply, unsure of what Nikola means.

"When we found out he was Jack the Ripper," Nikola continues, "Helen tried to kill him. When we met him again during the hunt for Adam Worth, not one of us offered to look for a reason behind his compulsion to eviscerate." Nikola's face contorts in anger. "For crying out loud, he was our friend and we all assumed he was a soulless murderer rather than think it could have been a side effect from the Source Blood! Maybe his bloodlust could have been managed the same way mine was." Nikola sighs softly. "Why did we never try to help him?" he whispers.

Shame seizes Nigel's heart. He can't deny that it never crossed his mind to figure out what had happened with John that he ended up committing those horrible crimes, murders so horrific they chilled even experienced men to the bone.

Helping Nikola, however, well, there has never been any question about that. Because he loves him. Because he's in love with him. Because he has been for more than half a century.

As far as he knows, James and Helen have never tried to help John. Not exactly.

Yet Nigel can't help feeling guilty. As Nikola has said, they were friends. Still, where helping Nikola seems possible, he wouldn't know where to begin with John. Nikola's choice of targets makes sense. The Nazis were monsters; Nikola was right about that. How much the men who would claim that they were only following orders actually espoused the Nazis' terrible ideology can't be known. Nikola's rage and grief turning towards those who had harmed his people and so many others is something Nigel can understand. He can't grasp at any redeeming straws for John. He can't find any excuse for the terror and horror Druitt visited upon those poor unfortunate women.

"I don't know, Nikola. I don't know," Nigel answers honestly. He long ago decided to always be honest with his friend. "What I do know," he continues fervently, "is that you can't compare yourself to him. Your situations are quite different." Doubt clouds Nikola's features. "Nikola," he says, and walks to his friend, putting his hands on his shoulders. Nikola looks at him, eyes locking with Nigel's own. "When you were with John, hunting and killing Nazis all over the planet for all I know, who killed the most of them? Who enjoyed it the most?"

+++

There is a crack in the paint on the ceiling, running from the lamp to the south-east corner. Maybe he should offer Nigel to do a new coat of paint, Nikola idly wonders as he lies on his bed in the guest room of the Griffins's home. Susan is cooking in the kitchen, telling Nigel about her day at the hospital as her husband sets the table. Nikola forces himself to ignore the conversation, mentally cursing his enhanced hearing. Shifting to his vampire side, he brings one hand up before his face, examining his claws in the waning light of the evening. He has killed people with these claws, slashed their throats with great relish, stabbed them in the gut, teased menacingly running them down their necks, the tang of fear filling his nostrils.

He hasn't answered Nigel this afternoon. Those years spent with John all blur together in his mind now. He was the one who asked John to kill Nazis with him. Surely that makes him responsible for all those deaths, even though those monsters had it coming. And yet, mostly, he watched as John killed them excruciatingly slowly, looked on as he was bathed in the flavour of their terror. And unlike John, there are no other people whose death he would enjoy. He didn't even enjoy it when Edison died. Or when others who had wronged him passed on.

Nigel is trying to help him. Nikola's not sure what his friend expects. He's not going to kill humans again, and will always refuse to drink human blood. The only exception will remain the time when he arrived starving at Nigel's. He has stopped trying to resurrect the vampire species. He is not certain he won't pick it up again down the line though. Maybe this is what Nigel wants: Nikola's promise that he won't ever again seek to do so. Fear tugs at his heart further, fear that Nigel wants more, wants Nikola to live again as he did before World War II. Nikola doesn't think there is enough of the old him left in who he is now for that. Does he want to try for Nigel's sake? Perhaps he should. He has nothing to lose if it doesn't work. He is convinced that Nigel will always remain his friend no matter what. After all, James and Helen haven't even killed John, and their attempts have been half-hearted at best.

Nikola has everything to gain. Nigel hasn't said it in so many words, but if Nikola can find himself again, find the good man that he used to be, then Nigel would be open to renewing their relationship in all its previous aspects. His cock stirs at the memories that rush through his mind. He bats them away ruthlessly because they're about to have dinner and he really shouldn't sport an erection for that.

+++

For the better part of the last year, Susan has watched her husband's friend slowly open up, going out of the house and tentatively joining the community of abnormals of the area. Now, as summer slowly turns to fall, she wonders if he will leave. She hasn't brought up the subject with Nigel yet. It's obvious his friend is now better, if not fully well. It's taken a long time, a good two years at least. And yet, when she sees her husband's easy friendship with the vampire, she is loath to chase him from their home. Yes, he could move out and visit Nigel instead of living with them. Still, she fears that, should she ask Nigel for his departure, he may refuse.

Tough it still seems a bit strange to her, a part of her wants him to stay. Nigel is happier with him around. Not that he looked unhappy before. But he smiles more now. And there is no denying that Nikola and Nigel share a special bond, a bond that dates back to another century, a century she has never known. She can't ask for Nikola to leave when his presence brings her husband such joy. Nikola brings something to Nigel that she simply can't herself.

Nikola, she knows, helps the abnormals of the area with the electrical wiring of their homes so that it is more efficient. He repairs appliances and cars for the poor families that couldn't possibly buy new ones. He certainly as a gift for engineering, she muses. Of course, he has, she chides herself, remembering his past life. However, it's one thing to know the reputation of a man and to see it with her own eyes. She wonders why he is seemingly satisfied with this simple life when he used to build worlds. War changes people, it's true. However, the extent of the change remains puzzling.

+++

The days are short, and it often rains heavily. At least, it doesn't snow, Nikola notes. Three years he's been here, living in Nigel's house. He's been here too long. He should have left months ago when the rage and grief which had stormed in his heart since the war, since carnage in the Balkan woods, finally receded when faced with Nigel's steadfast friendship. Standing at the foot of the bed, lighted by the rays of the sun filtering through the dark clouds and the light curtains of the window, Nikola looks around his room, the guest bedroom of the Griffins's house. Three years' worth of accumulated possessions. Well, he only began gathering those, beyond a few garments, after he moved from the couch to this room. Mostly, there are books, but also a radio – so he can listen to a different program from the other occupants of the house if he wants to – and a few purely decorative objects, such as a lamp with a stained glass lampshade, which makes the evenings spent in his room feel as if he were transported to a magical land of fairy lights.

He will miss this place, miss the crack of the wooden walls at night, miss hearing Nigel puttering away in his lab during the days, miss the dinners with Nigel and Susan, whom he has found to be a witty intelligent woman upon further acquaintance. He must leave. He cannot stay here where he is simply stagnating. He has given up on resurrecting the vampire species but he still wants to go to Bhalasaam to learn more about his ancestors' civilization and find out what technological marvels they achieved in ages past.

He takes a deep breath and holds it in, then slowly exhales, letting go of his doubts about the course of actions he's decided upon. He bends down and gets the big brown suede bag he's bought the previous week from under the bed where he's stored it. It's big enough that he can bring with him all that he does not wish to leave behind. Not the lamp though, but he knows Nigel will keep it and it feels as if... as if he's leaving a piece of himself behind. Of course, he is in a way. A part of him lives in Nigel's heart.

Seeing what happened between John, Helen and James made him doubt all kinds of romantic notions about the importance of love. It had all seemed so destructive. Helen and James, destroyed inside but presenting a cold front to the world. John haunted by dashed hopes and broken dreams. Perhaps this was why Nigel and he never promised each other anything. Nothing could break; nothing could be lost.

And so the love he shared with Nigel has saved him, brought him back from the dark pit of despair he fell into.

He starts filling the bag with a layer of clothing, summer garments he will not need right away. Then he adds some books, then another layer of clothes. Between the clothes, he nestles a few precious trinkets of little monetary value. He finishes his packing with stuffing the last of his clothing in it, along with the basic necessities he will be sure to use as soon he settles somewhere new, even if that place is a hotel room.

Even without accessing his secret funds he has some money to travel with, as some of the abnormals he's helped out insisted on paying him. Although each donation was small, the total sum is a decent amount thanks to all the work he's done since last spring.

He's just zipped the bag when there is a knock on his door.

"Yes, Nigel?" This time of day, it can only be his friend. And while he was lost in his thoughts enough that he didn't hear him coming – losing track of the ordinary noises of the house is hardly dangerous – a sound from either the front or back door, or even one of the windows, would have startled him.

The door opens slowly, as if Nigel isn't quite sure whether his words were a question about his visit or an offer to come in. Nigel freezes, hand on the doorknob, when he sees the full bag on the bed and, with a glance, ascertains what is missing from the shelves and in the wardrobe, the door of which is ajar.

"Going somewhere?" Nigel asks, his tone guarded, a frown marring his forehead.

"Yes. Nigel, I thank you for your hospitality. I really must leave now though. I've lingered here too long and can't keep on intruding on your marriage."

"Don't you think I should be the one to decide whether you're intruding?"

"Nigel, I truly appreciate your friendship and all you've done for me these past years. Hell, even before then to be completely honest." Nikola smiles sincerely at his friend. "I have to move on and go live my own life now though. I promise you I won't revive vampires," he adds with a wink.

Nigel remains still for a moment, silent. Then he takes two powerful strides and Nikola's face is caught in his hands and he's kissing him. Nikola's not responding when he opens his mouth; it's shock. Because Nigel hasn't kissed him in almost a decade, hasn't indicated that he even wanted to. When Nigel slides his tongue between his lips, Nikola grips him by the lapels of his jacket and kisses him back furiously. There's nothing gentle or elegant about this kiss; it's a wet mess of lips and tongues and teeth that leaves Nikola breathless. His mind is blank. There is something he should be thinking about, he knows, but there is nothing he can focus on other than the heat and his blood pounding and Nigel. Nikola sinks into the kiss, hugging Nigel closer with his arms around his waist instead of clutching him like a drowning man.

He can hear Nigel's speeding heartbeat, a counterpoint to his own. Someone moans, Nigel or himself, perhaps both of them; he is too far gone to be able to tell. Nigel shifts against him and, worried he might be pulling away, Nikola tightens his grip on his waist. Nigel's hand slides into his hair, grabbing the back of his head, as his other hand curls around his throat. It might have been threatening if Nikola wasn't who he is; his thumb strokes over Nikola's pulse point lovingly.

When they finally part, stop kissing, Nikola has no idea who initiated the move. Probably they are so in synch that it came from them both. Nigel is still wrapped in his arms; Nikola relaxes his grip somewhat. Nigel pulls down Nikola's head so their foreheads can touch, and they rest like that in each other's space, breaths mingling. His erection is painfully hard inside his pants, and he feels the answering pressure of Nigel's own against his hip. Nigel moves his hands from Nikola's head and neck and slides them down his chest, tugging Nikola's vest and shirt up once he's reached his belt.

That's when reality reasserts itself for Nikola and he pushes Nigel's hands away and takes one step, two steps, three steps back.

"We can't," he says adamantly.

"Why not?" Nigel looks genuinely puzzled at Nikola's sudden distance.

"Nigel, you're _married_. I can't... We can't," Nikola says, his heart breaking, and, if he weren't a vampire, he is certain he would feel sick.

"Nikola, it's not... it's..." Nigel stops trying to talk and takes a deep breath to help slow his racing heart. He closes his eyes as he takes another and, when he releases it, stares at Nikola, blue gaze locking with blue gaze.

"Nikola, thank you for your respect towards my marriage. I would never ever cheat on Susan, and by that I mean sleeping with another woman. What you and I have however, it's different. It's more than lust, and even if it were, which it isn't, you're a man, so I'm getting something I couldn't get within my marriage."

The rude, dirty thought is still half-formed in Nikola's mind but somehow Nigel guesses what is going to come out of his mouth in about a second and raises his hand to silence him.

"It's not a question of physical acts," Nigel continues. "It's a matter of mental space. You know it's not the same when you're with a woman and with a man."

"I'd say it's different with each person," Nikola replies slowly, and truthfully. He's always felt that way in this regard. "Which means you could make excuses for everybody. You've completely lost your mind. I won't help you cheat on your wife. She deserves better than that."

Nigel shakes himself. "Of course, you're right. I just... I don't want you to go, Nikola."

"I can't stay here forever in limbo. There's nothing for me here."

"Our friendship isn't enough?" Nigel says, his voice heated.

"That's not the point!" Nikola shouts back. "I had a life, a career. I want to do more, be more than this abnormal community's repairman!"

"So your wanting to leave has actually nothing to with my marriage?"

Nikola remains silent, breathing heavily. Pretending otherwise would be a lie. He isn't sure he can resist Nigel much longer if he stays. He sits down on the bed, punching his bag off of the bed so that it lands on the other side from the door as a sign of his willingness to stay.

Nigel eyes him suspiciously. "Don't you dare steal away in the dead of the night!"

"Would I do that?" Nikola replies with what he knows to be his most charming grin.

"Yes, you would. And it wouldn't be the first time either."

Nigel leaves the room without another word, closing the door behind him. Nikola collapses backwards on the bed, legs still over the side. He can't help but feel that Nigel's remark isn't fair. If Nigel hadn't been cavorting in France with that Resistance woman, Nikola might not have left with John without a word or a note to anybody. Then again, he can hardly blame Nigel for what he did. With a sigh, he rolls over on his side, glaring at his bag, willing it to unpack without Nikola having to get up and do anything, but the power he inherited from the Source Blood so long ago isn't telekinesis so his staring results in nothing. With another sigh, Nikola rises from the bed and begins to unpack.

Half-way through, he starts putting everything back without care. His instincts were right. He has to fucking leave. Nothing good can come of his staying. And if Nigel won't let him leave without making a scene, he'll just have to steal away during the night.

+++

Susan eyes the alarm on her bedside table. Thanks to the sliver of moonlight streaming in between the curtains, she can read the time. 4:00am. It's earlier than her alarm is set for, even today when she has the early morning shift. But she feels wide awake so she cancels the alarm and slides out of bed, wrapping her robe around her body. She exits the bedroom silently and makes her way to the kitchen.

When she enters, she is surprised to find Nikola rummaging in the fridge. Before she can ask him why he didn't turn the kitchen lights on, she remembers he can see in the dark, and then she notices the bag near his feet.

As she turns on the lights, Nikola looks up guiltily, a jar of blood in hand.

"You are leaving," she states. Nikola doesn't even bother offering a confirmation, simply closing the fridge door. "Why like that? Why without saying anything?"

"It's easier like that," Nikola says.

"For whom?" Susan asks.

"Well, me." Nikola winces. "Saying goodbye is too difficult."

"Are you even planning to stay in touch?" Nikola looks away. "I'm not even going to pretend I know what it's like to be friends with someone for seventy years, but just running away like that is cowardly. What are you for fuck's sake, twelve?" Noticing his shock at her swearing, she continues in her low but impassioned tone. "Oh, spare me! Just because I'm too well-raised to swear doesn't mean I don't know how. You can leave this house any time you want, but not like this. This is so extremely rude after all the time you've stayed here." Nikola opens his mouth, but she doesn't let him have his say. "I get that you and Nigel have fought over something, but really, isn't your friendship worth more that? Well, this is my house too and if you're leaving, it'll be after we throw you a farewell party!"

Nikola stares at her for a moment and she glares back at him. "Okay, I'll stay for now and give proper notice when I decide to leave." Then he grins. "You're a lot more fun that I thought you were."

"You've clearly mastered the art of the backhanded compliment," she deadpans.

"Thank you," he says. "I mean, for looking after Nigel when I couldn't."

She isn't entirely sure that Nigel actually needed it, but she nods, seeing this is clearly important to Nikola. He promptly takes his bag in hand, nodding back, and leaves the kitchen with both bag and blood.

+++

Nigel's been fretting for a week, half-expecting Nikola to leave anyway without saying goodbye. Again. He's been waiting for three years – well, longer if going into details – to rekindle his relationship with Nikola. He has waited till the man was well again, his friend wanting to leave a signal that he now is, no longer needing Nigel to keep his head above the water.

He didn't expect Nikola to refuse to sleep with him. That makes Nigel love him more. For all that Nikola doesn't care about rules, he does have morals. Nigel can understand. His friend has always treated each of his lovers in a unique manner, none of them blurring with another, each one distinct and cherished. Nigel has always separated men and women in his mind, viewing sleeping with someone of the same or the opposite sex as emotionally different. But within a particular sex – and to be completely honest with himself, especially when it comes to women – some of his lovers have smudged together in his mind over the decades.

Nigel wishes he could tell Susan that he wants Nikola to stay here and be his lover. But for all that his wife is a forgiving and accepting woman, he thinks she would probably be horrified that her husband wants to have sex with another man. And that Nikola wants him in return. It's considered an illness; that much, like his own feelings for Nikola, hasn't changed.

+++

Nikola is still hesitating over staying or leaving. When he can't stand being in the house anymore, he goes for long walks. At night, because hearing Nigel with Susan has become torture. One night, on his way back, he notices a dark shape entering the garden so he puts on a burst of speed. To John's credit, no sound escapes him when Nikola barrels into him.

"John?" He gets up and extends his hand to the other man. "Sorry, I thought you were a burglar." John accepts his hand, glancing back towards the house. "Let's take a walk," Nikola says. No use risking Susan and especially Nigel hearing them.

John nods and silently follows Nikola. They walk till the edge of the wood without a word.

"What brings you here?" Nikola asks as they settle in the grass.

"I wasn't sure you'd still be at Nigel's but I thought he might at least know where you were."

"Why did you want to see me?" Nikola asks, laying down on the grass, hands behind his head.

"To see how you've been," John replies, looking up at the stars rather than down at Nikola.

"I'm better now," Nikola says, skipping to the important part.

"You don't seem to be," John says, his tone neutral.

"I..." Nikola stops the lie as soon as it starts leaving his mouth. "You know what? You're right, I'm not," he says, sitting up. John finally turns towards him. Nikola jumps to his feet and starts pacing, as John sits unperturbed, hands resting over his raised knees.

"Nigel wants us to sleep together even though he is married, and I just can't do that! But the longer I'm staying, the more I want to just throw myself at him. His wife is a good woman; she deserves... the truth at least."

John doesn't answer immediately after his outburst. "Surely you must see how difficult it would be to bring it up if you were to play the honesty card."

Nikola growls low in his throat, the change to his vampire side surprising him. He doesn't bother shifting back.

"Nikola, you can't wait for Nigel's wife to die to be with him again. You don't even know he is going to live that long. You should always be with your loved ones while you still have the chance."

Nikola drops to his knees in front of John, leaning close to him. "Even if it goes against everything you believe in?"

"Yes. Nothing matters more than love," John says softly.

"How poetic." Nikola closes the distance between them, shifting swiftly, and kisses John. He pushes him backwards, John offering no resistance. He needs this, Nikola thinks, as he tears at John's clothing, loosening his own pants quickly. John responds eagerly, with his kisses and the way his hand joins Nikola's around both their cocks. If only having sex with Nigel wasn't so fraught with complications... Nikola chases the thought, focusing on John, who rolls them over, pressing Nikola in the grass.

"Fuck, faster," Nikola says, and John obliges.

+++

After his encounter with John, Nikola still ponders what to do for a couple of weeks. As much as he loves and wants Nigel, the decision is far from easily made. There is a part of him whispering in his ear that if he can't have his friend all to himself, then it's better not to have him at all. In some way, it makes sense. Another part just _wants_. Wants anything and everything that Nigel is ready to give him. It's a desire that constantly simmers, and that a mere smile or side look from Nigel can ignite. And then there's the guilt. The idea of Susan not knowing about it makes him uncomfortable. Nigel's wife is a very fine woman, and Nikola dislikes the idea of lying to her.

If he leaves though, that will be it. They'll never be together again. Nigel seems to be convinced that the Source Blood is going to fail him, to stop providing him with the gift of longevity. It's true they've never found the same marker in Nigel's blood as in Helen's, who hasn't even been sick since the 1880s. Nigel barely looks any older than he did then though, and Nikola has been straining his vampire hearing trying to catch irregularities in his heartbeat or anything that might indicate a less than perfect health. He has found nothing. He refuses to believe that Nigel's death could be any sooner than decades away. Still the thought gnaws at his heart, spurring him to become Nigel's lover again, even if he would in essence be following John's advice, but that thought disturbs him far less than it would the other members of the Five.

A fortnight after his aborted departure, Nikola wakes up with his decision made. It feels right. Somehow, his heart and his conscience have squared things up during the night as he slept. (Or he's stopped pretending that he would be able not to give in.)

Nevertheless, he doesn't throw himself at Nigel as soon as Susan is out of the house. It would be unbecoming. He showers and shaves because he doesn't want to be anything less than immaculate. He's somewhat low on fine clothing, but he still dresses in what is his best suit at the moment. Even if they're skipping straight to dessert, that is still not reason enough to look shabby or casual. He can hear Nigel working in his lab. Some abnormal or other is due to pick up one of Nigel's concoctions, which means Nikola has to wait till after the lunch hour. He himself is not hungry. He has taken two rations of blood this morning, unbeknownst to both Nigel and Susan. Since he left England in 1944, he has stopped taking his medication. At first, there was simply no point curbing his bloodlust. And then, somewhere along the lines, he learned to control himself without it, to properly identify the situations that can set him off. In those cases, not being hungry in the slightest helps more than determination not to attack, maim and kill anybody.

The abnormal comes and goes, Nigel moving around in the kitchen and now making coffee if the sounds alone are anything to go by. Nigel lingers in the living room for a while. When Nikola finally hears his steps moving back towards his lab, he rises from the bed, and moves swiftly towards his bedroom door.

Nigel starts when Nikola throws his door open, and then quickly recovers, rolling his eyes at Nikola's antics. Nikola can't help the grin that spreads on his face. He has never liked being made fun of but Nigel's gentle teasing has never felt like mockery.

"What do you want, mate?" Nigel asks with a grin of his own.

There is no need for words at this time; Nikola simply slips into Nigel's space and kisses him.

+++

Nigel had been thinking Nikola would never choose to be with him again so he can't help feeling relieved as his friend presses him into the mattress, his naked skin warm against his. He drags Nikola into another kiss, preventing the vampire from moving on to even more pleasurable activities. But he can't get enough of it and, by the way Nikola doesn't protest, he clearly can't either.

Nikola breaks their long slow kiss, sitting up abruptly, applying pressure just under the head of his cock to slow down his ardour. "Damn," he says, but he is still grinning, looking down at Nigel, amused rather than embarrassed.

When Nikola finally slides into him – God, he's missed that – he is almost crying. Nigel hugs him close, nails digging into his shoulders, knowing that he doesn't have to hold back because Nikola will heal in a flash no matter what happens.

"You're a bloody idiot," he whispers fondly in Nikola's ear. Nikola responds with a noise that is, impossibly, between a squeak and a growl. Laughing, Nigel holds on tighter as Nikola speeds up his thrusts.

There is wetness on his shoulders when Nikola reaches his peak and, for a moment, Nigel thinks his friend is crying tears of joy. When Nikola moves back a little, he sees the other man has actually bitten his lips hard with too sharp teeth to prevent himself from screaming. The delicate flesh is knitting together now, but some blood has run down Nikola's chin and onto Nigel's shoulder.

"Idiot," Nigel mumbles again. Nikola licks the blood off of his chin before sliding down his body and taking Nigel's cock in his talented mouth. And Nigel can't think of any witty quips to fire at his friend.

He rakes his hand through Nikola's spiky hair as his friend sucks him off. He sees stars behind his closed eyelids as Nikola cleverly draws him to climax.

By the time Nigel cares to stop revelling in the afterglow and takes stock of his surroundings, Nikola has moved back up the bed. Nigel rolls onto his side to face him. Nikola looks serene, which tells Nigel he doesn't regret his decision. He strokes Nikola's cheek with his thumb, making his friend smile.

Nikola moves closer to Nigel till they're touching everywhere, Nikola's arm held loosely around his waist. Nigel runs his hand up and down Nikola's back, savouring the texture of the warm skin under his palm. Their kiss is unhurried, lazy almost, making Nigel feel as if he is drowning in their love. He has never felt more at peace.

+++

Susan has no idea why her husband is suddenly much happier. Not that he ever struck her as unhappy before, though he was on occasion tense or worried, but not unusually or unreasonably so. But now, he seems to be particularly elated. Nikola is the same as ever, although he has seemed more settled to her this past handful of months. She has always been one to notice changes, but there is nothing to indicate the reason behind this one. Not that it is something to be worried about of course, but she likes to understand things. She always forgets all about that as her husband lovingly pleasures her in the night. She's never felt more loved. Not that she has had anything to complain about before, Nigel being far more talented in bed than her first husband. But they certainly have never made love – as people now say – quite that often.

After a few weeks, she puts her worries behind her. Why should she be concerned about her husband's happiness and Nikola's further helpfulness around the house?

+++

Nikola inhales deeply. Nigel and Susan will probably think he is taking in the engaging smells wafting off of the breakfast table. But as enticing as they are, even to him, they are not what has caught his attention. Something smells _different_ in the house. He can't pinpoint it and he has absolutely no idea what it could mean. At least the smell doesn't alarm him in that almost animalistic way – his vampire instincts – he's learned to trust long ago.

He keeps trying to identify the smell throughout breakfast, its ebb and flow, sorting out what it is composed off. It reminds him of something he has smelt once before but he can't place it, as if he had been distracted at the time or judged it to be inconsequential.

Distracted, he pours blood instead of maple syrup on his pancakes and Nigel looks at him disgustedly, though he is perhaps only pretending to be offended, whereas Susan is clearly trying not to burst out laughing. She gives up after a while, burying her face in her hands as she shakes with laughter. Nigel gives up on his disgruntled expression and joins in as Nikola takes one of his bloody pancakes in hand and folds it in two, taking a bite defiantly, as if he actually meant to do that. It tastes odd, blood and pancake not exactly going together well, but it's not bad either.

Susan eventually recovers, as Nigel's gaze encompasses both of them with fondness. Susan doesn't notice as she is focused on him.

"How does it taste?" she asks. Nikola works on swallowing his mouthful of blood-covered pancakes before answering. "The blood I mean?" she adds.

He takes a moment before answering thoughtfully: "It's like the most intoxicating of liquors and the most filling meal, except you're actually neither drunk nor full." He doesn't add that feeding on blood is a lot like getting aroused, or high.

"So are you always hungry then?"

"No. No, I'm not. But I've never had this sensation of a full stomach after a particularly hearty meal as I had as a human. Or well, can still when I eat human food." And that is the truth. Perhaps when vampires gorge on humans they feel that way, but Nikola never has. "I think I get nourishment out of it extremely fast," he continues. "There is very little digestion time if you will. But I'm not hungry again until I start getting low on energy reserves."

Susan nods, and Nikola looks at her carefully. She is simply curious, happy to take on this new knowledge. He smiles at her, before turning back to the mess he's made in his plate.

+++

Nigel thinks he's never been happier as Susan takes hold of his arm while they exit the restaurant. He is living with the two people he loves most, his wife and his best friend, while helping the abnormal community without disrupting their lives as they would if displacing them. The only thing that could possibly make him happier would be raising a child. He's never brought up adopting one with Susan, but perhaps he should. Tomorrow. For now, he just wants to get home and take her to bed. He tries to squash the guilt he feels over the fact he's been sleeping with Nikola behind her back, and isn't quite successful.

+++

It's still there and it's starting to irritate him. It's not unpleasant, but not knowing what the damned smell is is annoying. It's been days now since he first smelled it. It's not always as strong as it was that morning at breakfast, but it is always there somehow, however slight it is at times.

Nikola's been unable to identify the source. Faced with this failure, he's decided to remember when he's encountered that odour before.

Even now, it never stops to astound him that he learnt how to meditate from Jack the Ripper of all people. In an effort to stop himself from killing, John had strived to find some inner peace, spending years with Buddhist monks. That hadn't worked as well as he hoped for. John couldn't prevent himself from killing all the time, but he was able to resist the temptation more frequently that he had before. During the time they spent together tracking down Nazis, Nikola witnessed John meditating. When his old friend unabashedly explained why he did so, Nikola asked him to teach him. Since then, it has proven quite helpful in controlling his bloodlust. Not being constantly medicated is... freeing. He doesn't feel shackled by his medication anymore, as if his very existence depended on it, which it doesn't. As it turned out, Nikola has enough strength of will to control himself on his own, without chemical help.

He sits down on the bed, Indian style, bypassing lighting a candle in favour of letting electricity crackle around his hand in a way that has never failed to relax it. He focuses on his breathing, and then the smell.

When he finally recalls the correct time and place, it's at first entirely unhelpful and for a moment he thinks he's gotten it wrong somehow. But his meditation always brings him back to this point. In his mind's eye, he sees Helen and James together in the library of the London Sanctuary, known as the Magnus home to him then. That happened shortly after John was discovered to be the Ripper. James and Helen were pouring over books when he came to visit them to say his farewells before he left for America. They had immediately transferred to the parlour, where they had asked for his help. He didn't have much time to build the device they wanted, which they were pretty vague about. He finally demanded they tell him what it really was about, warning them that otherwise he would only be able to do a shoddy job in the time he had left to devote to this task. And time, it seemed, was of the essence for them as well. The day he first encountered that smell was the day he learned Helen Magnus was pregnant with John Druitt's child, with _Jack the Ripper_ 's child.

His head swims with possibilities. Could Susan be pregnant? Nigel has told him she can't have children. Pregnant women don't usually smell different to him. Is it an effect of the Source Blood?

If Susan is pregnant, there will be other manifestations of it soon enough. Should he tell her of his suspicions right away? Or Nigel? Would that only prove cruel if she isn't actually expecting?

At dinner, he looks at Susan out of the corner of his eyes, trying to spot a telltale sign. She's smiling a lot, but as he's never paid such close attention to her before, he isn't sure if that is actually relevant. He gets what he is looking for when Susan rises from her seat to clear the table. She is walking like a pregnant woman. He knows this is something women do unconsciously from early on in a pregnancy.

He bites his tongue so as not to blurt this revelation out stupidly. He is surprised to find he is happy. Happy for her, happy for Nigel. This time though, he will have to leave, which he realizes wouldn't even bother him.

The next morning, when Susan leaves for work, he follows her. He calls her when she is about to enter the hospital. Susan turns back sharply, surprise written on her face.

"Nikola, what are you doing here?"

"Is there some place private we can talk?" he asks once he's near her.

"Sure," she says. She doesn't enter the hospital, instead leading him to a park two streets over.

"You're lucky I'm early," she says as she sits down on a bench. There is no one near them. "What is it? Is it about Nigel?"

"Well, no." He takes a deep breath. "Susan, I think you're pregnant."

"What? Niko... I can't... Why?" In shock, she stumbles over her words.

"This will sound odd, but I can actually smell it."

Susan seems to focus inwardly, before looking back up at him.

"I have never actually been sure that I couldn't." Nikola holds his breath as his friend's wife confides in him. "I was married once before Nigel. Did you know that?" He nods as he remembers Nigel mentioning something to that effect in passing. "During all those years, I didn't conceive. And there were a lot of opportunities for it." She blushes at the intimate admission, Nikola smiling gently in response. "I have never been a woman who absolutely wants children. Not that I was opposed to the idea either. But when I started seeing Nigel, I had rather he believed I couldn't have children at all because I didn't want to go through an enormous amount of stress trying to have a baby, with doctors wondering what was wrong with me." It's possible that Helen and the Sanctuary could have helped in a more efficient manner. That it's been six years since Nigel and Susan have been married seems to confirm the problem couldn't have come from Susan's first husband.

"I guess you're a woman who doesn't conceive easily," Nikola says slowly. "You should make sure you are though. I suppose my sense of smell could be wrong."

She cracks a smile at that, then sobers up. "You haven't told Nigel of your suspicions?" she asks.

"It seemed to me that you ought to be the first to know."

She nods at him and he can see gratitude in her eyes.

"Well, you'd better hurry back or Nigel will wonder what happened to you."

"Hey, I leave the house sometimes."

"Only when you can't help it, and you usually complain about it before hand," she smirks.

Nikola resists the temptation to stick his tongue out at her with difficulty.

+++

Susan walks to the hospital in a stunned state. As soon as Nikola said he could smell her pregnant, she's felt the truth of her state. She is almost late for work now so there is no time to have a doctor check it right away. She'll have to wait until after her shift finishes.

Throughout the day, she is distracted, though she manages not to make any serious errors. She knows Nigel will be happy. He had hoped to have children after all. Part of her wonders what Nikola plans to do, if he will ask to stay or if he will leave. Over the years, she's grown accustomed to his presence, and she has to admit it would be strange not to have him in the house anymore.

In the evening, she walks back home, the knowledge that Nikola's senses were true strong in her heart, hands straying to her stomach, though there is no change to be felt yet.

Nikola is in the living room when she arrives, reading one of the battered old books Nigel brought with him from England to America. She winks at him on her way, but doesn't stop, aiming straight for Nigel's lab at the back of the house. The vampire waves cheerfully back at her, an ear-splitting grin on his face.

"You could prepare dinner," she tells him over her shoulder. She doesn't look to see if he complies, but hears his book being clapped closed. She knocks sharply on the door of Nigel's workplace, waiting for an answer before she comes in. She doesn't venture into his lab often, chemistry having never been something she's much interested in, but she likes watching him work and has on occasion done so, amazed by the precision of his hands.

"Come in," she hears as her husband's voice drifts through the door.

Susan opens the door carefully and slides in. Nigel smiles upon seeing her. He stops what he is doing and walks to her. She steps into his embrace and meets him half-way in a searing kiss. God, but she loves this man. She was worried about the strangeness of the world he lived in at first, but she has never once regretted embracing it, not even when his emotionally-scarred vampire best friend showed up on their doorstep.

Nigel pulls back a little, eyes shiny.

"Missed me?" he asks mischievously, his hands straying down her back, below her waist.

She knows what he is asking; she rarely comes to see him in his lab immediately upon coming home.

"Always." She grins mischievously. "I also have something to tell you." Her expression turns happy, her smile very large.

"Oh?" She can easily see the curiosity in his eyes.

"I'm pregnant," she says, not delaying the important news by pointless rambles. Nigel's eyes grow large, and he opens his mouth, as if to speak, but he just may be trying to get more air into his lungs.

"Are you sure?" he finally asks.

She nods. "I said that I couldn't, but I never actually checked. I told you I couldn't, because I didn't want to go through medical testing."

"I would never have insisted..."

"You seemed to want children so much," she interrupts.

Nigel opens his mouth, no doubt to argue the point, but he closes it, and smiles instead. "How far along are you?" he asks.

"Two weeks."

"Two weeks?"

"I had no reason to suspect anything, but Nikola told me I smelled pregnant," she says, gesturing vaguely and rolling her eyes a bit. Nikola has been proven correct, but the thought's still rather ludicrous. Nigel frowns. "He told me and not you because he felt I should be the first to know."

"That's all right." She can tell by the way he is smiling that he really doesn't mind.

"So you're happy then?" She's only partly teasing him.

Her husband's only answer is to kiss her deeply. She melts into his arms. After Michael's death, she had never thought she could ever be as happy as she had been with him. But she has, thanks to Nigel, and now she is even more so. Part of her wants to keep on kissing Nigel forever, to stay in this moment until the end of time. But reality, in the form of a burnt smell, intrudes and interrupts their kiss.

"What is that?" Nigel asks.

"Probably Nikola cooking dinner."

There is smoke in the kitchen when they arrive and Nikola looks as if he's just put out a fire.

"I'm an engineer, not a cook," he says, by way of explanation. "Besides, you should go to a restaurant to celebrate."

"Good idea," Nigel says, clearly not wanting to salvage the kitchen immediately.

"You should come with us," Susan offers, extending her hand towards Nikola.

"No, no, no, no, no" Nikola says, gesturing with his hands emphatically. "This moment is for you two. I'll clean up this disaster."

"Come now, you're practically part of the family." Nikola's eyes widen. "Uncle Nikola", Susan continues, "running crazy experiments in the garden shed." She grins. "You've got to come with us."

"Well, if you insist," Nikola says, throwing a look at Nigel.

"I do," Susan replies, linking her hand with Nigel's.

+++

Susan's pregnancy goes relatively smoothly, much to the two men's relief. Nikola suggests quite early that they should consult with Helen. What if Susan accidentally becomes invisible? It's possible that the baby has inherited his or her father's gift and that it can transfer to Susan during the pregnancy. But Nigel refuses and Susan agrees with him. Nikola cares far too much about his friendship with both husband and wife to go against their decision.

However, trouble comes to them from outside. When it happens, Susan looks horrified. Possibly because Nikola's instinctual reaction has been to slice up their attackers. Nigel recovers from his shock quickly.

"I assume you had a good reason to kill these people," he says.

"You mean other than the fact they were trying to either take us prisoners or kill us?" Nikola says.

"We could have..."

"No. They have to know we mean business too."

"Do you know these people?" Nigel asks.

"They're not government agents. James and Helen would have warned us. They are far too well connected for anything like that going on without their knowing about it. And those guys weren't amateurs." Nikola looks over the five dead bodies. "We should call someone to help clean up."

"What?"

"I know you don't hang around scum anymore, but if there's one thing I've learned from being around John is that it's damn useful to know some. I actually have an idea as to who they might be but the sooner we get those bodies off of your front porch the better."

Nigel doesn't argue anymore, and simply makes sure Susan is all right, while Nikola transfers the corpses to the backyard. He hides them near the shed under tarp and hurries off to his underworld contacts. Nikola suspects luck had nothing to do with the fact their neighbours are both on vacation at the moment. Their attackers chose their time to strike. He mentally berates himself for not noticing the house was under surveillance. He promises himself that he won't let that happen again, won't let himself be distracted with the joy of living with Nigel and Susan and will make sure neither comes to harm as well as their child.

+++

There are no further attacks during the rest of the pregnancy. Nikola decorates the house for Christmas while Susan rests on the couch, having taken time off from the hospital. Nigel has been hired in a store in town for the holiday season. With Susan not working, they needed more income. Privately, Nikola thinks Nigel should just have accessed his reserve of stolen funds and taken some time to be with his pregnant wife. At least, neither Nigel nor Susan has complained about Nikola providing lots of new Christmas decorations this year.

"I think it should be on another branch. There is already too much gold in this area," Susan says.

Nikola steps back from the tree and looks at where he was about to hang the bauble. Susan is correct; it would be better someplace else.

"Do you think the little one will be here for Christmas?" he asks.

"Goodness, I hope not! She or he would be too early if they were born before Christmas."

"Yes," Nikola allows, "but it'd be nice."

"Sure, if you want to be up all night at Christmas because of the baby crying."

"You never know. Maybe he or she will be a quiet baby." Nikola grins at her.

"Somehow, I don't think that will be the case. But you know, seeing as you don't actually need all that much sleep, you should be the one who handles all the diapers at night." Susan bursts out laughing at what he knows must be an extremely ridiculous look on this face, eyes wide and mouth hanging open.

+++

"Nigel, sit the fuck down!" Nikola says, at the end of his rope. "You're wearing a hole in the floor."

Nigel stops and glances at him before he resumes his pacing.

"If you don't sit down, I'll bite you."

That gets Nigel's attention for more than a second. "You drank three jars of blood a couple of hours ago. You can't possibly be hungry."

"I don't want to eat. Your pacing is making me angry and I always want to bite people when I'm angry." And that is the truth, though not quite all of it. He can smell blood coming from the bedroom where Susan is giving birth, two abnormal midwives assisting. There's not a whole lot of it, probably not enough to be concerned. He doesn't tell Nigel that because he is fretting enough. Besides, if he wanted to know what went on, he could go into the room. Nikola doesn't even understand why he hasn't already. Of course, in the time they were born in, it simply wasn't done, but Susan probably wouldn't have said no and they're paying the midwives enough to be able to ask for something so simple as that. But Nigel clings to the idea a man doesn't belong in a birthing room, and is driving Nikola insane in the process.

Nigel sits down in an armchair, Nikola exhaling a slow quiet sigh in relief. Two minutes later, Nigel is back to pacing, and Nikola buries his head in his hands.

+++

Her daughter, Anna, rests in her crib, swathed in pristine clothing, tiny fist closed around her father's finger.

"I would have thought she'd be bigger," Nikola says.

"Well, I'm glad she wasn't!" Susan replies. Nikola at least has the grace to look sheepish.

"Do you need anything?" he asks.

"I'm good," she says, and glances over to Nigel, who is completely fascinated with his daughter. She looks back at Nikola, who is smiling in a loving way that she is sure matches the one on her face.

"I'll go prepare some dinner," Nikola says.

"Don't burn down the kitchen again," Susan says.

"I didn't burned it down last time. Not quite anyway. And I'm making salad and sandwiches tonight so we should be safe." He grins at her, rolls his eyes at Nigel, who doesn't notice, and exits the room.

Susan scoots closer to her husband, looking down at their daughter, who yawns sleepily.

"Thank you," Nigel murmurs.

"I love you too," Susan replies.

+++

Four years later, Nigel is seating on a chair at the kitchen table, watching an invisible Anna playing in the summer rain in the back garden, water clinging to her skin, making her look like a scintillating fairy as rays of sunshine pierce through the dark clouds. Nigel's hair is mostly white now, and thinning out, his face increasingly marked by the passage of time. The Source Blood has done a lot, for many decades, but time is catching up now

He turns back sharply towards Nikola.

"Nikola, will you look after my family when I'm gone?"

"You're not..."

"Nikola."

Nikola lets his gaze be lost in Nigel's own pale blue eyes. He knows. _He knows, he knows, he knows._ Thinking about it isn't something he wants to do. Nigel drags him into confronting the knowledge with his unwavering stare.

"I will," Nikola whispers, "I promise." Then he shuts his eyes tightly against the tears that are rising in them.

When he opens them again, Nigel is looking back out. Anna is now visible, squatting in the mud with her back towards them, tearing clumps of grass from the ground, delighted by how easy the soaked soil makes the act.

Nikola moves on the bench, moves closer to Nigel's chair. His friend looks back at him. After a brief glance back at Anna, to see she's still not paying them any attention, Nikola leans forward, his lips touching Nigel's carefully.

"I'm not made of bloody glass, you bastard," the Englishman scolds him, before kissing him again, a hungry kiss that lights Nikola's every nerve ending on fire, even though it's far too short for his liking. Nigel breaks the kiss and turns towards the yard again. Anna, Nikola had forgotten where Nigel hadn't. And just in time because Anna swivels to look at them.

"Daddy! Uncle Nikola! Look what I found!" she says, a worm dangling from her fingers, the poor unfortunate creature curling in protest.

Nigel briefly glances back towards him, his smile an echo of Nikola's, love in his eyes, for his child, and as well for Nikola.


End file.
